"Don't pound on locked doors." -My horoscope today.
Hi. It's March! Which means by the end of this month, we've completed Quarter 1. Q1, people. Please, let's straighten our ties. Let's grab life by the bra strap.
Goal-setting: not my strongest. But yes, I did buy a spiral-bound astroplanner so that I can motherboard my life in accordance with the planets. And here's what I decided: for 2024, I'm focusing on creating a more substantial Body of Work.
In 2018 I self-published a novel. (Admittedly I have the worst attitude about it). I have a sprinkling of short stories published in some underdog lit journals. But nothing incredibly noteworthy.
Historically this has been a sensitive subject for me. But now I'm like, it is what it is. I'm over my baggage, you know? What's the friggin' point? So I can feel miserable all the time? Umm, no. I'm no longer sucking the self-loathing lollipop, I'm happy to report.
In the past I've talked some trash about me and writing. I tend to go negative. Sometimes rather hard. I once compared my writing to a terrible boyfriend who I keep going back to. Jesus Christ, Lara.
The truth is, I love writing. I love it so much I want to marry it. In fact, we've been married since I was about 11 years old? Maybe younger. We were married young. And when I treat writing right, honestly it treats me right.
What do I mean by that? I give it time, attention, love. A relationship!
Okay anyway, get a room, right? Here's what I want to tell you, friend: I'm almost finished with a second novel. I love this novel. I love my first novel, too, but I also sort of hate it. This one I love a little more unconditionally because somehow I've been more real with myself about it. Hard to explain.
Themes covered in upcoming novel:
celebrity obsession
IVF
when you don't really want to become a mom but then you become one
marriage and infidelity
slutiness
white savior complex
But the writing of a novel is very lonely. So writing here, on my blog, and having some of you occasionally read it-- or maybe just my subject line!--by golly, it really helps.
I have changes in my mind for my "online presence, " but for now, I want to say hello.
I'm not banging on a closed door, here. This one's wide open.
Gracias. Merci. (Can you tell I'm on Duolingo?)
Love, Lara